Tuesday, 24 July 2012

DVD review: They Call Me Macho Woman (1991)

Macho Woman! She arms herself with instruments of steel, glinting in the dappled woodland sunlight. Moving with skills derived from the most primitive atavistic survival instincts, she repels the onslaught of countless troops, her arms a blur as she wildly hurls high-tech handmade weapons, demolishing her attackers with unwavering accuracy. Yet she is no Green Beret, trained in the world´s most dangerous war zones to fend for herself - she is Susan Morris (Deborah Sweaney), down to earth, mobile young woman who simply desired to escape the crazy city! Little did she know what was in store for her... While looking for a charming country house, Susan inadvertenly finds herself in the clutches of a Brawny brute, Mongo (Brian Oldfield), and his gang of elitist corporate bullies. Angered by the interruption of their environmentally destructive activities, Mongo´s minions ruthlessly abduct and imprison Susan. That long and somewhat totally wrong text on the backside of the DVD-cover is probably the result of some Troma employees wild fantasy, the description of the storyline that is available at IMDB is much better "A young widow on a trip to the backwoods stumbles upon the operation of a gang of drug smugglers. They attempt to kill her in order to keep their operation a secret, but she turns out to be more resourceful than they thought, and starts to turn the tables on them." They Call Me Macho Woman is written, produced and directed by Patrick G. Donahue. The acting is bad throughout, the camerawork and editing is okay. There is a nice blooper when Susan and the home agent are trying to get away in a car, the cameraman sits in the backseat and all of a sudden his hand appear on screen for a few seconds... It quickly becomes repetetive, as they capture Susan, she escapes, they capture Susan and she escapes again and so on... There are a couple of really dumb scenes and some dialogue that is priceless. There is brief moments of gore, fr instance a guy gets spikes thrown into his eyes. It´s all practical make-up fx. No T & A in this.
This review is based on the region 1 DVD release from Troma and btw the girl on the DVD cover isn´t in the movie. They Call Me Macho Woman is also known as Savage Instinct (which features a much better cover)
Rating: 2½ out of 7. It isn´t good but it´s enjoyable, almost nonstop action and the flick gets better around the 60 minute mark when the Susan finds a tool shed and equips herself with hatchets, a whip and some nine inch nails and turns into a one woman army. But I´m still wondering why the heck does she polishes the blades and spikes until they sparkle in the sunlight...


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